OPEN LETTER TO CIARA: “Baby Mama #4” or not, please put your child first

Russell-Wilson-Future-Ciara(www.TheSingleMomClub.com) – R&B singer Ciara Harris became “baby mama #4” when she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy with boyfriend “Future.” Since the two have split, their nasty to watch custody battle had been playing out in public.

Being Baby Mama #4 isn’t the issue, considering that other celebrity Baby Mama #4  club members include singer Alicia Keys (Swizz Beats) and actress Lauren London (Lil Wayne.) Being the side chick turned main chick is happening more and more but when it harms the children that’s just too much to accept.

The name “Baby Mama” is often said with deep negativity. Many successful women start out as fiancés or wives only to end up as “Baby Mama.” No matter how a mom became a baby mama, how she handles herself matters most. So, TheSingleMomClub.com decided to provide you with the TOP FIVE RULES of BEING a GOOD BABY MAMA.

No one wants to have this turn into the mess that Amber Rose and Wiz Khalifa created imagewith their son when they broke up.

  1. It’s all been done before: Try not to take your position too seriously. After all, as Baby Mama you’re bound to know about your lover’s other children. Whether or not the children are in his life, do not matter. What matters is that you have to understand that he’s done this before. Do not treat your child better the other children. Try to treat them like siblings and with respect, which only helps your child.
  2. Play  your position: As the child’s mother, you’ll have to accept that your child and their father need to have a relationship that is separate and apart from you, unless there is domestic violence or the father is coo coo for cocoa puffs. If you and the dad cannot get along, consider having another person help facilitate the drop offs and visits. Do what’s best for the child, not what makes you feel superior.
  3. Bend over backwards. Bending over isn’t just something to do to make a baby, it’s also something that good parents sometimes do to achieve the ultimate benefit for their child. Try with everything you have to have a decent relationship with your child’s father. (You can always throw darts at his photo when you’re alone) When your child is around, try to speak positively about your ex, unless there was domestic violence then all bets are off until psycho dad gets help from a shrink like Dr. Jeff Gardere or Dr. Phil.
  4. Birthdays, holidays and special occasions: This is a topic we’ve covered a lot here. (Remember “Oh Shit! It’s Father’s Day” and other related posts?) It cannot be said enough that if you can at all work it out for your child see his/her parents getting along, your child will be better for it.
  5. Check yourself before you wreck your child: Now that you’re dating again, odds are that the new boyfriend will need to tread slowing with the child. If there’s too much involvement, the child will be harmed if or when the relationship fizzles. Plus, the boyfriend may find himself nursing a broken heart after helping raise a child that was not his own. It can also cause great tension between parents if it seems that you’re trying to make next man the new daddy. So, try to include the father (and maybe) your boyfriend in the parties, holidays and special occasions. Here’s a little guide on how to make it easier.
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